Wondering

Wondering what is next, I'm so impatient sometimes to find out what God has next, or knowing parts of the puzzle He has laid out for me and not knowing exactly how its going to all fit together. I know why He does it that way, because He wants us to trust Him and be amazed when He molds it all together. In the mean time though sometimes I want to be like five and throw a "but just tell me God" fit, but I also know he would just look down and think "Oh no there she goes again". So I wait, be still and just allow Him to move. Right now I'm searching for a second job, trying to adjust to this super early morning schedule and also keeping up with my blog. I have so much "I want" going on right now, that I find my self continually having to say...it is really not about what I want...I want a car, I want to be able to get a place quickly...it is so very much not about what I want. It is completely about what God has, and this time I NEED, MUST do it His way. My way has never panned out, as a matter of fact everytime I do it my way it ends in a jumbled, train wreck of a mess...point being the place I am now ha ha. So Lord I am not perfect, and my way is so messy, that I get cross eyed trying to figure out what is going on. I surrender all my I wants, and all my rants and raves to You Holy Father, trusting in Your way, Your timing and Your will for my life. When it truly comes down to it...all I want is You. With out You I have no chance. You are my life, my Best Friend and everything of worth I find in You, my Jesus savior, and Lord.